Introduction

It is still strange to me that of the 32 years I have been alive, the majority of them were spent either believing in, or fearing to leave, a religion. In the 19 years I spent being affiliated with churches, I attended the following: anglican, protestant, alliance, lutheran, baptist, and various fundamentalist and evangelical offshoots. As a child I took my faith very seriously, and was often singled out at school for being strange and preachy. My teenage years were spent at a Bretheren in Christ boarding school, and attending vineyard churches, as well as being part of the early congregation at the toronto airport christian fellowship.

Lately I have been doing a lot of trying to come to terms with my childhood, and to ameliorate my relationship with my mother. I feel guilty sometimes that I find it so much easier to get along with my spouse's parents than with my own. I am happy just being able to talk to my half-sibs and sending my father a Holiday card annually. That's fine. My mother on the other hand, the one who raised me, has retained so many of the same attitudes and mannerisms, that she's just really hard to get along with.

Most of it is the religion. She feels responsible for my salvation, and keeps wanting reassurance that I share her values. Frankly, I don't.